Day Thirty-Two – The Razzies

1 02 2010

Awards Season is rolling along and we’re hitting the point where you lose track of all the awards being handed out and to whom.

Being the day before the Academy Award nominations are announced; the Razzies have announced their nominations for worst of 2009.

The Razzies are fun because they manage to poke fun at not only movies themselves, but the concept of Hollywood patting itself on the back. I always thought it would be funny if someone actually decided to show up and accept their award.

It's true that the Golden Raspberry means nothing at the end of the day, but isn't that the case with all awards?

That is, until Halle Berry picked up hers five years ago. It started funny enough, but then she took it as an opportunity to slam all the people she worked with. Some, such as People.com, thought it was a show of class, but I thought it was just the opposite. Being a good sport means taking responsibility, not blaming “the terrible cast” around you.

Most that are nominated aren’t the movies that tried and failed, but instead were spawned out of laziness and unoriginality. The inclusion of the “Worst Remake, Sequel or Rip-Off” is just another example.

Normally, as I did with the Golden Globes, I would have some type of prediction on who is going to win what, but that’s just what the Razzies are making fun of. Not to mention, I haven’t seen any of the nominees.

Here they are:

WORST PICTURE

All About Steve

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Land of The Lost

Old Dogs

Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen

WORST ACTOR OF 2009

All Three Jonas Brothers

JONAS BROTHERS: THE 3-D CONCERT EXPERIENCE

Will Ferrell

LAND OF THE LOST

Steve Martin

PINK PANTHER 2

Eddie Murphy

IMAGINE THAT

John Travolta

OLD DOGS

WORST ACTRESS OF 2009

Beyonce

OBSESSED

Sandra Bullock

ALL ABOUT STEVE

Miley Cyrus

HANNAH MONTANA: THE MOVIE

Megan Fox

JENNIFER’s BODY and TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN

Sarah Jessica Parker

DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE MORGANS?

WORST SUPPORTING ACTOR OF 2009

Billy Ray Cyrus

HANNAH MONTANA: THE MOVIE

Hugh Hefner (as Himself)

MISS MARCH

Robert Pattinson

TWILIGHT SAGA: NEW MOON

Jorma Taccone (as Cha-Ka)

LAND OF THE LOST

Marlon Wayans

G.I. JOE

WORST SUPPORTING ACTRESS OF 2009

Candice Bergen

BRIDE WARS

Ali Larter

OBSESSED

Sienna Miller

G.I. JOE

Kelly Preston

OLD DOGS

Julie White (as Mom)

TRANNIES, TOO

WORST COUPLE OF 2009

Any Two (or More) Jonas Brothers

THE JONAS BROTHERS 3-D CONCERT EXPERIENCE

Sandra Bullock & Bradley Cooper

ALL ABOUT STEVE

Will Ferrell & Any Co-Star,
Creature or “Comic Riff”

LAND OF THE LOST

Shia LaBeouf & EITHER
Megan Fox OR
Any Transformer

TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN

Kristen Stewart & EITHER
Robert Pattinson OR
Taylor Whatz-His-Fang

TWILIGHT SAGA: NEW MOON

WORST REMAKE, SEQUEL OR RIP-OFF

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Land of The Lost

Pink Panther 2

(A Rip-Off of a Sequel to a Remake)

Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen

Twilight Saga: New Moon

WORST DIRECTOR OF 2009

Michael Bay

TRANNIES, TOO

Walt Becker

OLD DOGS

Brad Silberling

LAND OF THE LOST

Stephen Sommers

G.I. JOE

Phil Traill

ALL ABOUT STEVE

WORST SCREENPLAY OF 2009

All About Steve

Screenplay by Kim Barker

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Screenplay by Stuart Beattie and David Elliot & Paul Lovett

Based on Hasbro’s G.I. JOE® Characters.

Land of The Lost

Written by Chris Henchy & Dennis McNicholas

Based on Sid & Marty Krofft’s TV Series

Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen

Written by Ehren Kruger & Roberto Orci & Alex Kurtzman

Based on Hasbro’s Transformers Action Figures

Twilight Saga: New Moon

Screenplay by Melissa Rosenberg

Based on the Novel by Stephenie Meyer

In a neat set of bonus awards, they have also decided to do a ‘Worst of the Decade’ set of awards.

I think it would be pretty cool if the Oscars did something similar. It would be a good way to avoid snubbing films that deserve the win in order to give the award to someone they owe.

Here they are:

WORST PICTURE OF THE DECADE

Battlefield Earth (2000)

Nominated for 10 RAZZIES® / “Winner” of 8
(Including Worst Drama of Our First 25 Yrs)

Freddy Got Fingered (2001)

Nominated for 9 RAZZIES® / “Winner” of 5

Gigli (2003)

Nominated for 10 RAZZIES® / “Winner” of 7
(Including Worst Comedy of Our First 25 Yrs)

I Know Who Killed Me (2007)

Nominated for 9 RAZZIES® / “Winner” of 8

Swept Away (2002)

Nominated for 9 RAZZIES® / “Winner” of 5

WORST ACTOR OF THE DECADE

Ben Affleck

Nominated for 9 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 2 RAZZIES®
DAREDEVIL, GIGLI, JERSEY GIRL, PAYCHECK,
PEARL HARBOR, SURVIVING CHRISTMAS

Eddie Murphy

Nominated for 12 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 3 RAZZIES®
ADVENTURES of PLUTO NASH, I SPY, IMAGINE THAT,
MEET DAVE, NORBIT, SHOWTIME

Mike Myers

Nominated for 4 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 2 RAZZIES®
CAT IN THE HAT, THE LOVE GURU

Rob Schneider

Nominated for 6 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 1 RAZZIE®
THE ANIMAL, BENCHWARMERS, DEUCE BIGALO: EUROPEAN GIGOLO,
GRANDMA’s BOY, THE HOT CHICK,
I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU CHUCK & LARRY, LITTLE MAN, LITTLE NICKY

John Travolta

Nominated for 6 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 3 RAZZIES®
BATTLEFIELD EARTH, DOMESTIC DISTURBANCE, LUCKY NUMBERS,
OLD DOGS, SWORDFISH

WORST ACTRESS OF THE DECADE

Mariah Carey

The Single Biggest Individual Vote Getter of the Decade:
70+% of ALL Votes for Worst Actress of 2001

GLITTER

Paris Hilton

Nominated for 5 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 4 RAZZIES®

THE HOTTIE & THE NOTTIE, HOUSE of WHACKS, REPO: THE GENETIC OPERA

Lindsay Lohan

Nominated for 5 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 3 RAZZIES®

HERBIE FULLY LOADED, I KNOW WHO KILLED ME, JUST MY LUCK

Jennifer Lopez

Nominated for 9 “Achievements,” “Winner” of 2 RAZZIES®

ANGEL EYES, ENOUGH, GIGLI, JERSEY GIRL, MAID IN MANHATTAN,

MONSTER-IN-LAW, THE WEDDING PLANNER

Madonna

Nominated for 6 “Achievements,”“Winner” of 4 RAZZIES®

DIE ANOTHER DAY, THE NEXT BEST THING, SWEPT AWAY

Tomorrow we’re back down to “business” with the Academy Awards. I’ll have my predictions then.





Day Twenty-Three – I Miss the Drive-In

23 01 2010

About the same time that Christmas ends, my hatred for winter begins to take hold. No longer can I drive without worrying about the little old lady behind me, following a little too closely. Trips to the beach are the most depressing sight, with half melted snow barely covering the litter left in the fall. Yet, most disappointing of all is the closing of the drive-in.

Maybe I’m exaggerating a touch, but the drive-in has always been a metaphor for the care-free summer nights of the yesteryear. Watching the sunset behind the big screen. Hearing the crunching of gravel and sand as movie-goers find their parking spots. The smell of popcorn mixed with a cool summer nights breeze. There’s nothing like it.

Though the backdrop in Oakville isn't quite as spectacular, it still gives me that warm feeling inside.

I must confess, I didn’t get to the drive-in more than once last year due to the awful summer weather. If the weather-man is nice to us all this coming summer, though, I’m ready and willing to make up for it.

As far as specific venues go, I’m a big fan of the 5 Drive-In in Oakville. They really sell the family aspect of going to the drive-in and love to play up the nostalgia. They used to play a Woody Woodpecker cartoon before the first feature and they still play the “Let’s All Go to the Lobby” song and dance.

It’s also a lot more affordable than going to a regular movie theatre. You get two, sometimes three, new releases for $11.00. It can get as low as $5.00 for the same movies on Tuesdays or $15.00 for “Carload Thursdays”. Not to mention you can control who you sit next to.

The 5 Drive-In was open all the way until Christmas last year, thanks to the mild weather. As much as I like having it as my special thing to do in the summer, I really hope more people go and support this theatre. The summer nights at the drive-in are something I look forward to all year-round and I would hate for that to end. So if you have a car, grab yourself a comfortable pillow and drive your way down to Oakville to catch a couple flicks.

I plan to this summer and I can’t wait.





Day Eighteen – Golden Globe Results: I’m 11 for 22

18 01 2010

The Golden Globes have come and gone with a few surprises. Some I was happy for, others not so much.

Let’s go through ’em. Once again, I got the results from EW.com.

FILM AWARDS

Best Picture, Drama
Avatar WINNER
The Hurt Locker
Inglourious Basterds
Precious
Up in the AirMy Pick

When I had made the prediction, I hadn’t seen every film nominated, but I did by the time the Globes aired. I stand firm on my choice for Up in the Air. The hype for that film was right. The Hurt Locker was just as worthy, even according to Cameron himself. Avatar is an excellent version of Transformers. It’s fluff, not Best Picture.

Best Picture, Musical/Comedy

The Hangover was the only true comedy in the category and deserved the win.

The Hangover WINNER
500 Days of SummerMy Pick
It’s Complicated
Julie & Julia
Nine

It’s nice to see something that most people had seen to win an award, but this makes me worry for the Oscars. The Hangover was a great comedy, but I still think that (500) Days of Summer was a more complete film. It wasn’t so much of a Comedy and based on that alone, I think The Hangover was the only true comedy there. I’m definitely not upset about the win.

Best Director
James Cameron, Avatar WINNER
My Pick
Kathryn Bigelow, The Hurt Locker
Clint Eastwood, Invictus
Jason Reitman, Up in the Air
Quentin Tarantino, Inglourious Basterds

I thought Cameron would win this award to acknowledge his box office success, but they’d give Best Picture to the better film. I was wrong.

Best Actor, Musical/Comedy
Robert Downey, Jr., Sherlock Holmes WINNER
Matt Damon, The Informant!
Daniel Day-Lewis, Nine
Joseph Gordon-Levitt, 500 Days of SummerMy Pick
Michael Stuhlbarg, A Serious Man

I’m shocked. I haven’t seen Sherlock Holmes yet and I didn’t expect him to win. It seems like they were going more for box office this year, and given that, this seems like the right choice.

Best Actress, Musical/Comedy
Meryl Streep, Julie & Julia WINNER
Sandra Bullock, The ProposalMy Pick
Marion Cotillard, Nine
Julia Roberts, Duplicity
Meryl Streep, It’s Complicated

This probably shocked me the most. I thought the Meryl Streep vote would have been split, allowing Sandra Bullock to come up the middle. Somehow, she managed to win yet again. If she had one nomination, I would have chosen her, but even a split vote can’t stop her.

Best Actress, Drama
Sandra Bullock, The Blind Side WINNER – My Pick
Emily Blunt, The Young Victoria
Helen Mirren, The Last Station
Carey Mulligan, An Education
Gabourey Sidibe, Precious

They still managed to get it to her.

Best Actor, Drama
Jeff Bridges, Crazy Heart WINNERMy Pick
George Clooney, Up in the Air
Colin Firth, A Single Man
Morgan Freeman, Invictus
Tobey Maguire, Brothers

If you sing and act, you almost guaranteed to win. Not to take away from Jeff Bridges, who was owed this for a while.

Film, Best Supporting Actress
Mo’Nique, Precious WINNER – My Pick
Penelope Cruz, Nine
Vera Farmiga, Up in the Air
Anna Kendrick, Up in the Air
Julianne Moore, A Single Man

I don’t think anyone expected her to lose. I almost wanted her to after hearing about her refusal to campaign.

Best Supporting Actor
Christoph Waltz, Inglourious Basterds WINNER My Pick
Matt Damon, Invictus
Woody Harrelson, The Messenger
Christopher Plummer, The Last Station
Stanley Tucci, The Lovely Bones

If anyone else won this category, it would be a huge upset.

Best Screenplay
Jason Reitman & Sheldon Turner,
Up in the Air WINNERMy Pick
Neill Blomkamp & Terri Tatchell, District 9
Mark Boal, The Hurt Locker
Nancy Meyers, It’s Complicated
Quentin Tarantino, Inglourious Basterds

Definitely the most deserving screenplay of the bunch. There’s not a wasted line in this entire film. Everything leads to something.

Best Animated Film
Up WINNERMy Pick
Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs
Coraline
Fantastic Mr. Fox
The Princess & The Frog

Pixar maintains its dominance.

Best Song
“The Weary Kind,” Crazy Heart WINNER
“Cinema Italiano,” Nine
“I Want to Come Home,” Everybody’s Fine My Pick
“I Will See You,” Avatar
“Winter,” Brothers

I thought they’d go for the celebrity pick, but McCartney was a presenter so they didn’t need to give him the award to put him on stage.

Best Score
Up WINNER
The Informant!
Avatar
A Single Man
Where the Wild Things Are My Pick

If I had picked with my heart, this would have been my pick.

Best Foreign Language Film
The White Ribbon WINNER
My Pick
Baria
Broken Embraces
The Maid
A Prophet

I thought so, just based on the buzz at the Toronto International Film Festival.

Cecil B. DeMille Award
Martin Scorsese

My guess is George Lucas wins this award next. Him or Francis Ford Coppola.

TV AWARDS

BEST TELEVISION SERIES – DRAMA
Mad Men (AMC) WINNER
My Pick
Big Love (HBO)
Dexter (Showtime)
House (Fox)
True Blood (HBO)

Any of these shows, except this season of True Blood, could have won this award and I would have been happy. All were deserving this year.

BEST TELEVISION SERIES – COMEDY OR MUSICAL
Glee (FOX) WINNER
30 Rock (NBC) – My Pick
Entourage (HBO)
Modern Family (ABC)
The Office (NBC)

I thought Glee would win if 30 Rock didn’t. It’s the new popular show. Modern Family deserved it a little more though.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A TELEVISION SERIES –
COMEDY OR MUSICAL
Toni Collette, United States of Tara WINNER
Courteney Cox, Cougar Town
Edie Falco, Nurse JackieMy Pick
Tina Fey, 30 Rock
Lea Michele, Glee

My guess is because she played four different roles on the same show, people think she’s a great actress. I used to watch the show, but didn’t make it to the end of the first season. I wasn’t a huge fan.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A TELEVISION SERIES –
COMEDY OR MUSICAL
Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock WINNERMy Pick
Steve Carell, The Office
David Duchovny, Californication
Thomas Jane, Hung
Matthew Morrison, Glee

This is his award until he retires.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A TELEVISION SERIES – DRAMA
Michael C. Hall, Dexter WINNER

A deserved win for Michael C. Hall, wearing a toque to cover the effects of recent cancer treatments.

Simon Baker, The Mentalist
Jon Hamm, Mad MenMy Pick
Hugh Laurie, House
Bill Paxton, Big Love

I was really happy to see Michael C. Hall win this award. He’s definitely deserving, especially for this season of Dexter.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A TELEVISION SERIES –
DRAMA
Julianna Margulies, The Good Wife WINNERMy Pick
Glenn Close, Damages
January Jones, Mad Men
Anna Paquin, True Blood
Kyra Sedgwick, The Closer

This was a pick I made based on what people are saying. I haven’t seen the show, but expected her to win.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE IN A SERIES,
MINI-SERIES OR MOTION PICTURE MADE FOR TELEVISION
John Lithgow, Dexter WINNER

Michael Emerson, Lost
Neil Patrick Harris, How I Met Your MotherMy Pick
William Hurt, Damages
Jeremy Piven, Entourage

I thought this was the year of NPH, but I’m very happy with John Lithgow’s win. It was such a chilling performance. NPH will be back, but this was the only year that Lithgow could have won for him pitch perfect Trinity Killer.

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE IN A
SERIES, MINI-SERIES OR MOTION PICTURE MADE FOR TELEVISION
Chloe Sevigny, Big Love WINNER

Jane Adams, Hung
Rose Byrne, Damages
Jane Lynch, GleeMy Pick
Janet McTeer, Into the Storm

I’m surprised, but I agree. Chloe Sevingy is the reason Big Love is interesting. Without her, they’d be able to live their lives conflict free and who wants that?

It was a good show overall. The Oscars can take note on how quickly they go to the awards. No time wasted with long intros or excessive speeches. The only thing I noticed this year was people were quicker to list names. That’s got to be the most unentertaining thing possible. They need to find some way around it, like have the names listed behind them and just let them talk.

I’m worried about the Oscars though. Will they be trying to make up for last year by giving the Best Picture to Avatar as well? They want people to watch, so they might lean towards box office rather than quality. We’ll see, but hopefully they can put together a tight, quick and clean show like the Globes this year.

And hopefully my score is a little better.

The Hangover was the only true comedy in the category and deserved the win.





Day Seven – Why Does Everyone Love “Avatar”?

7 01 2010

I went to go watch Avatar the weekend it came out. I sat in an 11am screening, that was unusually packed for that time of day, and tried to get into what some are calling the best movie since Star Wars (Yeah, I mean A.O. Scott). I don’t know if we were in the same movie, because I had a really hard time sitting through it.

In the end, it's two an a half hours about a bunch of blue people and a tree.

Let’s ignore the fact that I’m pretty sure Disney already made this movie. Aside from some visuals that people who’ve never seen a Playstation 3 game before would be impressed by, there’s not much to enjoy here. The writing here is weak. Not “Meet the Spartans” weak, but “Transformers” weak. The only motivation for anything in this movie was to show off the visuals. I didn’t care much about the characters in this movie. The humans are dicks for no good reason. They want a rock under the blue guys’ tree and their only explanation is it’s worth a lot of money. Why is it worth a lot of money? Because we’re dicks and we like rocks. That’s the best explanation I could gather.

Sure, maybe I was being a little hard on the visuals when I compared it to the average PS3 game. There’s a lot of detail here. The Navi look convincing enough to keep me watching, but don’t look real. Especially when they’re standing beside actual people. Close, but still not buying it. I can get over that, though. What I can’t get over is the 10+ minute segments of Jake and his lady friend riding around on multi-legged rhino-horses and flying horse-adyctls. I get it, it’s beautiful. Why should I really care? I still don’t know anything about this world and why us, the dicks, want to tear it all up for a rock. Other than money. And we’re dicks.

Avatar is an okay movie that’s worth a watch. The 3-D was fine. Nothing that Kung-Fu Panda didn’t do just as well. But it’s not nearly as good as it’s getting credit for. It’s definitely not the Best Picture of the Year. Sure, it’ll get a nomination at the Oscars, but I’ll cry foul if it makes it any further than that. When did story become the least of all priorities?